Chapter 60 - The Conclusion

Azriel looked at his still face as if she was looking something strange. Was this something that could be said lightly like this? She was surprised when he killed the knights in a horrific way yesterday, but they were at least ‘bad guys.’ They were the people who kidnapped and threatened her and Charles. However, the village people were not ‘bad guys.’ She often went to hang out, helped and received allowances, and got along daily. She used to tell Rhema what happened in the village that day, whom she became close with, which family’s pie was great, and so on. And Rhema also used to help the villagers when they asked for a favor even though he was not so fond of it.

They were such people, and they might have been swept away in Rhema’s magic and killed. It was more shocking than the fact that the village chief overlooked her kidnapping. And Rhema’s attitude as he said such things was even more shocking.

It felt like the Rhema and a part of the world she had known until now were cracked. Azriel gushed out words with a trembling voice.

“Rhema, are you saying you might have killed Tom or other people? And there are some people who you made crazy? Then what about Hannah’s mom? Did she go crazy because of you? Is that why Hannah cried?”

“I forgot that they were the people you liked because I was in a hurry. I’m sorry, Azriel.”

With an embarrassed face, Rhema apologized. He seemed to be genuine but it was different. He was apologizing only to her. She did not see any sorriness or guilt toward the villagers. Azriel fell into disorder and thought. Who were those people to Rhema?

Suddenly all things welled up within her and filled her head. The gag that covered her mouth, the man who ordered to cut her finger off, dismembered knight, the bodies that Rhema crushed, Reddened robe, and, the village chief who overlooked her kidnapping, Tom who invited her to go look at a foal, the pit at the chief’s house, Hannah crying and bawling, Hannah’s father with a distorted face, the doors that were shut before her eyes, and, and— Her head spinned. Suddenly, everything became scary, even Rhema. Azriel stepped back and faltered as she tripped over the stairs. Surprised, Rhema tried to catch her.

“Azriel!”

She unconsciously pushed aside his hand. It was a weak gesture but Rhema was stiffened as he was. Sitting down on the stairs, Azriel looked up at him. Her wide golden eyes were welled up with tears.

“It’s strange,” she spoke in a stifled voice as if she was being strangled. “Why did you do that? Rhema, why did you do that? You don’t even know who was dragged into your magic and died?”

“…”

“Why did you turn Hannah’s mom that way? If you were looking for me, you could’ve just asked, but why?”

“…I’m sorry, Azriel. I’ll try to turn things as they were to the best of my ability.”

When she shed big drops of tears, he was startled. Compared to Rhema’s usual, dull and dry face, it was rarely a prominent face.

“I didn’t know you’d be shocked this much. I’m sorry. Please don’t cry.”

Stammering a little, he apologized repeatedly. Then he hugged her and patted her as usual. Azriel tried to push that arm away. However, she could not bear to push him away.

Rhema was someone who brought her back to life. He was the one who gave her a name and happiness, guided her to the new world of magic, and said that he would always stay by her side. He was no different than God in her life. So, instead of pushing him away, Azriel could only burst into tears, burying her face in his arms.

Rhema also noticed that his chest was getting wet. The girl’s entire body was shaking. Azriel was crying all because of what he did. He felt strange. If he knew that this would happen, he would not have done it. He regretted it. It was a regret about his actions in hundreds of years.

Then he was saddened. When he first went out with Azriel, he pondered upon the words that he murmured to himself, looking at the girl who said he was a good person. As expected, he was not a good person. He had to be. His master told him not to love anyone. So, Rhema cut out something inside him, put it in an egg, and sealed it. He was not sure exactly what he had cut out now that it had passed a thousand years since then. It was certainly something related to humanity. He called it emotion for now.

Since the beginning of the world, he was the first one to come up with such magic and use it. Even he, who used it, could not foresee what kind of effects it would have. Anyway, Rhema Reshith could withstand a long time without falling because of that magic. Living like that, he realized. A being that could not love a person was eventually a being that could not be loved by a person. There was no way a person who could not have a precious person could become a precious person to someone.

So, he could never be a good person or make someone happy. Nonetheless, he could not break the seal either. Rhema knew what he would become if he fell. Thus, if she stayed with him, Azriel would be miserable, like how she was crying now. He made a judgement like coming to a conclusion after gathering clues. And he decided to choose one out of three suggestions that Ofeq made. He neither wanted to kill her nor to make her cry. It was meaningless to leave her by his side after making her a doll that only smiles. He did not want that. Then, the best way among what that Ofeq suggested was—

‘…Take magic away from her. Erase her memory about you and close her dragon eye with force. Let her live as a person who has nothing to do with you. Don’t ever see her again.’