Married 24 Times

I opened my eyes.

I was staring at the same ceiling for the twenty fourth time. That may seem strange to keep count, but I meant the same ceiling with the same sunrise with the same bird chirps. The exact same day, for the twenty fourth time.

I was twenty years old and I was about to get married. Again.

Most girls would dream of the day they got to wear a beautiful wedding gown from the time they were little, but I had experienced this day twenty four times. I knew what came next. I closed my eyes to pretend that ceiling was not above me.

My husband would not love me.

Our marriage was one arranged since our births. Long before we were born, our grandfathers made a promise that their children would marry. But as fate would have it, they only bared sons. My grandfather's dying wish was for his family to be joined with the Leonhart family. Unfortunately during his lifetime he only saw grandsons, just like grandfather Leonhart.

Normally only having sons was a good thing, but both grandfather and grandfather Leonhart cursed their luck. I was born two years after grandfather died, on his birthday. My father immediately contacted the Leonhart family to fulfill that long awaited promise.

I was born to marry a Leonhart, but I was never wanted by any of the younger generations. I used to believe my husband would never care for me at all.

I opened my eyes and lifted my hand in front of my face. I couldn't feel that warmth any longer, and my face was completely free from wetness. None of his tears lingered.

He had been crying, but I couldn't fathom why. In all the lifetimes I had lived, I had never seen that man cry. Not once. He didn't shed any tears at our wedding and he never shed tears when his own father died a year after we were married.

So why would he shed tears as I was dying?

There was no way I could answer that with my current knowledge.

Each life I struggled to stop lingering in this endless nightmare, but no matter what I did, I would wake up to this same ceiling. If I tried to run away from my marriage, I died. If I tried to leave my husband, I died.

And in one year, two months, one week, and five days I would die on my twenty-second birthday. Again.

In just a while, my mother would come to help me prepare for my wedding. I didn't have time to put on a wedding dress. I needed to see that man. I don't know what I hoped to gain by seeing him, but I knew if I stayed put and did nothing I would go mad.

I crept over to the window and pushed it open, quickly making my escape. I had nine lives of escaping this marriage of practice, of course I could get away.

The only difference between those lives and this life, I was running away to the wedding, not from it.

I had to take the bus unfortunately, but I soon made it to the wedding venue. The groom's family was already there and I could see some of my family members running about. They would probably receive a phone call from my mother that I had disappeared sometime soon.

I had never arrived at the wedding venue early before. After living and dying twenty three times, it was odd to see something I had never once thought about. The preparations for my own wedding, huh. I had always just taken them for granted, but now I saw how many hours of work were put in. I wasn't supposed to arrive here for another three hours.

I snuck to a side door where the florist and her assistants were delivering the wedding flowers. I successfully slipped inside. Without my dress and make up, I was practically invisible.

Other than the engagement party, I hadn't interacted with much of my husband's family prior to my wedding. Remembering those previous interactions was basically impossible for me. I had lived through multiple lives between that year and now. I was only nineteen when we held the official engagement party, and I couldn't remember how it had gone. I only remembered my interactions with these family members after our wedding day.

I headed through the familiar halls towards the groom's room. When I made my way there and entered, I was disappointed to find him not there.

That man hadn't come early to our wedding?

I sighed. I didn't know what I was expecting. It was 9 in the morning now, but our wedding ceremony did not start until 1 in the afternoon. Why would the groom be here four hours early? Even I, the bride, hadn't arrived until an hour before.

I had been too determined to see him. Now what was I going to do?

I couldn't return home and I didn't have my cellphone to have my mother meet me here. I could reveal myself... or I could wait until that man showed up.

But what was I doing here, really? I left the groom's room and headed through the wedding venue. Even if I asked that man why he had been crying, it's not like his past self would know. None of what happened in my past lives would ever carry into the new one. I had learned long ago no matter how many times I died and reincarnated, I was the only one with memories of the years I had lived past my wedding date. Everyone else simply remembered the original twenty years of my life.

Those years overtook the years I had lived during my first life. The twenty years I had spent originally growing up, I couldn't remember finer points from them. I couldn't remember any of my primary school teacher's names, nor could I remember all of my childhood friends. There were times during my past lives where I would run into someone and not remember them. Though for them it had only been two years since we had last seen each other, for me it had been far longer.

Most women feared gaining wrinkles and grey hair, but wrinkles and grey hair were all I dreamed of. Aging at all, really, past twenty-two, would be heavenly. This was a form of hell in and of itself.

I sat outside the wedding venue with my chin resting in my hands. I could only wait until I was found. My mother would have to come sometime.

I was overcome with joy when I remembered, without me at my house preparing for my wedding, that woman's schemes were ruined. My original wedding dress was ruined on the morning of my wedding in all my past lives thanks to her. After my first five lives, I had given up trying to prove she had ruined my dress. That girl was so quick with her tongue, she always got out of it. But luckily for me, no matter which life, my husband's family was quick to respond with a new dress. But without me there to discover the dress, I wondered what would happen?

Would I simply never put on the wedding dress and never have to be abandoned by that man? As if that would be reason enough to stop this wedding promised for two generations.

Soon I would be discovered and that dress my husband's family had secretly prepared would appear. I always thought they were in cahoots with that woman. Though she was allowed to cause me misery, they weren't allowed to be shamed by a bride without a proper wedding dress. They let her cause her mischief, but only within reason.

As long as the Leonhart name remained pure and upright, it didn't matter what happened to me.

I grit my teeth. I had given up on revenge, but that didn't mean I was able to completely release the bitterness in my heart. The injustices I had suffered those past twenty three lives had never been righted. Of course I remained bitter.

Just as I was trying to calm myself down from my anger, I saw a face that made my heart clench. With anger, despair, confusion.

My husband had appeared.