My House Has Become a Filming Set!

Advertisement

 

༺ My House Has Become a Filming Set! – 30 ༻

 

  >> “Beru, calm down a bit;;;”

 

  >> “Poor puppy’s scaredㅠㅠㅠㅠ5959”

 

  Beru brushed off the negative comments heading his way and prompted Yeonwoo.

 

  “Right, Mr. Yeonwoo. I’d like to buy honey as well, do you sell it?”

 

  Yeonwoo’s pupils quivered slightly. He couldn’t discern whether the situation he was in was one of fear or anger.

Advertisement

 

  Perhaps because he had drunk alcohol, the world spun dizzily without any sense of direction. He couldn’t even recall where he currently was.

 

  “Mr. Yeonwoo. Hello? Are you selling honey? Everyone, Mr. Puppy isn’t responding, can we get some support here?”

 

>> “MyNameIsPickledRadish sent 500 chocolates.”

 

  “Thank you, PickledRadish! Mr. Yeonwoo, a reaction for the support, please react!”

Advertisement

 

  Beru pushed the camera lens even closer to Yeonwoo. It felt like the support was for Beru himself, while capturing someone else in distress.

 

  Yeonwoo found it hard to breathe. He couldn’t even muster a thought on what to do next. Trying to calm himself down, he tightly covered his eyes with both hands, shrouding himself in darkness.

 

  “Mr. Yeonwoo? Mr. Yeonwoo?”

 

>> “What’s this? A panic attack?”

 

>> “Beru sent an innocent citizen to the hospital. I’ll make sure to send Beru to the Lord.”

Advertisement

 

>> “Lmao, self-exposure lmfaooo”

 

>> “Beru is falling lol”

 

>> “Why? lmao It’s just fun!”

 

>> “I told you, don’t do this stuff please;”

 

>> “Bye~~ Farewell~lol”

 

>> “Lord, one more’s on the way kekw”

 

>> “Don’t bash Beru lol. Beru, you’re fun. Keep it up, I’m supporting you.”

 

Advertisement

  Until a moment ago, comments had been flooding in with support and donations for Beru. However, when they suddenly turned critical, a flustered Beru, sweating, tried to explain.

 

  “Everyone, Mr. Yeonwoo is drunk. You may not be able to smell it through the screen, but there’s a strong alcohol scent here.”

 

>> “Yeah, excuses?”

 

>> “Shouldn’t he go to the hospital?;;;”

 

>> “TrashyBeru sent 500 chocolates. Beru, stay confident. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

 

>> “How about the police station? Maybe you should go there.”

 

  Checking the comments, Beru cautiously approached Yeonwoo and shook his shoulder.

 

  “Mr. Yeonwoo, are you okay? Did you… drink a lot?”

 

  Amidst the chaos, a slightly calmer Yeonwoo managed to breathe and glaringly looked up, conveying, 

 

  ‘Don’t touch me.’

 

  He then glared at the live feed on the device close to his face and hastily turned it off. With the screen darkened, he felt more composed.

 

  “What the heck! Why’d you turn it off? This is a crucial moment!”

 

  Beru, seemingly forgetting the backlash he’d been receiving, lamented the potential loss of future donations and angrily confronted Yeonwoo.

 

  Yeonwoo grabbed the camera from Beru’s hand, lifting it up as if ready to drop it.

 

  “No! Do you know how expensive that is…!”

 

  After taking a moment to breathe, the alcohol’s effect felt like it was wearing off and his previously trembling pupils now found their stillness.

 

  “The hell, you asking if I drank? Yes, I did. Fuck, someone like you gets by just fine, right? Even if I break this, they’ll say it’s due to my weakened state, won’t they?”

 

  “It seems like both sides are at fault here, let’s settle, come on, settle.”

 

  “Huh? I was even threatened! Do you know how expensive this is?”

 

  While the village police and Beru were squabbling, examining the evidence from the video footage, Yeonwoo silently sat in a chair. At a glance, he seemed either lost in thought or somewhat subdued.

 

  Ironically, the one who reported to the police wasn’t Yeonwoo, but Beru. He stared blankly at Yeonwoo, who was dusting off his hands with a satisfied expression, looking at the shattered camera before him.

 

  With a dismissive glare, Yeonwoo addressed Beru, 

 

  “What are you looking at, bastard? Ha, I should’ve done this sooner.”

 

  He still seemed unsatisfied, grinding his heel into the remnants of the broken camera.

 

  While earlier Beru had been trailing Yeonwoo tirelessly for his broadcast, he had now reported the very person who’d smashed his camera, fearing he might run away.

 

  “So, are you saying it’s my fault? I suffered material damage! If you don’t compensate for this, I’ll sue! Seriously, just wait and see!”

 

  “You could also be sued for trespassing! And what’s this… ah, you filmed someone against their will? That’s an invasion of portrait rights too! This won’t do. Hey Yeonwoo, come here! Let’s sue!”

 

  “……”

 

  At the officer’s words, Beru clamped his mouth shut. His anger found an unexpected target. Despite the policeman’s call, he tapped on the unmoving Yeonwoo.

 

  Perhaps memories of the broken camera lingered because the touch was gentle.

 

  “Hey. Please say something. All of this happened because of you. Can’t we just end this amicably? If you just ask for the repair costs, I can act like nothing happened.”

 

  “Amyicably? I’m not going to pay. Fuck, why should I? If you want to sue, then do it. I’ll do the same. Let’s see in court who was more at fault.”

 

  Yeonwoo spoke indifferently.

 

  Beru bit his lip in frustration.

 

  ‘This guy might actually do it.’

 

  “It seems like both sides are at fault here, let’s settle, come on, settle.”

 

  “Huh? I was even threatened! Do you know how expensive this is?”

 

  Initially, he had intended to first scare with the threat of legal action and then steer towards an agreement for the repair costs, but as seen in the previous situation, when he said he’d do something, he really seemed like he would follow through.

 

  “What’s so big about life? Prison? Living in a limited space is my forte. Think of it as another stint on a deep sea  fishing vessel.”

 

  Even from his appearances on the currently airing variety show, he was gaining popularity for his no-holds-barred, straightforward approach.

 

  “Speaking frankly, was I the only one in the wrong? You started the quarrel first. You know your mistake is greater, right? Sue me. No, please do. Please.”

 

  Yeonwoo slowly stood up and locked eyes with Beru. Now, his eyes looked half-crazed. With a dismissive look, he patted Beru’s shoulder.

 

  “This too is fate, so if we meet in prison, let’s greet each other?”

 

  Beru, with a shaky voice, turned to the police.

 

  “Did…did you hear that just now? Threat, he threatened me!”

 

  The police plugged their ears, shaking their heads vigorously.

 

  “Didn’t hear anything? Sigh—I didn’t hear it either.”

 

  “……Small town cops.”

 

  * * *

 

  Beru left for Seoul without getting back even what he initially had.

 

  Watching his retreating back, grinding his teeth and shouting, “I’ll make sure this incident becomes public!”, just seemed pitiable.

 

  ‘Publicize it then. What will you do? Will we head to court together?’

 

  Yeonwoo, who had nothing to lose, wasn’t scared in the slightest. Instead, a sneering laugh bubbled up from within him.

 

  ‘Should I be the one to sue him first?’

 

  Thinking of suing and claiming for emotional damages and other related concerns, it didn’t seem like a bad plan at all.

 

  However, the difficulty was greater than that. At the moment, he didn’t want to do anything. Especially, the thought of seeing that face again made him feel as if his body would shake from trauma.

 

  He didn’t need anything else. He just wanted to go home to his cozy place and rest comfortably. After venting out various frustrations with the village policemen, he returned home as the sky dimmed into dusk.

 

  His body felt as heavy as if he were carrying a massive boulder.

 

  Even when he had spoken on the phone earlier, everything seemed fine. But after the incident erupted, the day felt incredibly taxing. Lately, strangers approached him often, but today was especially overwhelming.

 

  ‘…Alcohol.’

 

  Out of habit, he reached for the refrigerator looking for booze, but there wasn’t any. Perhaps Granny Kyeongyi had visited while he was away because there was no sign of any liquor.

 

  The only thing he had was a bottle of ‘Park○s’ he had received from the police station.

 

  Pouting, he shuffled not to his bedroom, but toward Granny Kyeongyi’s house.

 

  She wasn’t his biological grandmother, but visiting her house always gave him a sense of comfort from the distinct, calming aroma.

 

  From the closet, he pulled out a blanket, draped it over himself, and closed his eyes. The sensation of everything around him fading away provided some relief.

 

  His pocket buzzed with the vibration of his phone. Fumbling around, he retrieved it.

 

  “Hello?”

 

  “I saw the video. Are you okay? Did you hang up earlier because of that?”

 

  It was the voice of Shin Gihyeon. The video involving Beru had already spread virally on social media.

 

  “Yeah, who do you think I am? I gave him a good scolding.”

 

  His voice didn’t sound like someone who had scolded anyone.

 

  Shin Gihyeon also sometimes found it hard to bear people’s gazes. But this was the path he had chosen. Unlike him, Yeonwoo had unintentionally become famous as an ordinary person.

 

  There was no way he could be okay, but there was also nothing comforting to say. Gihyeon knew from experience that advice at such times wasn’t of any help.

 

  “Just get some rest.”

 

  He could only say that much.

 

  “Ah, thank you.”

 

  After hanging up, Yeonwoo curled up.

 

  He must have fallen asleep because after a while, he felt a hand nudging him awake.

 

  “Why are you sleeping in someone else’s house like this? Get up!”

 

  Even though it was the summer of August, Yeonwoo, who had draped the blanket up to his head, had sweat covering his face.

 

  “What is it? Did you have a nightmare?”

 

  Granny Kyeongyi tousled his sweat-drenched hair with her coarse hand. As Yeonwoo lay there accepting the touch, he pouted and whined.

 

  “I’m hungry.”

 

  The hand that had been stroking his hair lightly pushed his head.

 

  “What time do you think it is to be asking for food? Haven’t you had dinner?”

 

  When he looked at the wall clock, it was already past 11 PM.

 

  “I slept through.”

 

  Yeonwoo got up and clung to Granny Kyeongyi’s back, massaging her shoulders as she headed to the kitchen.

 

  “Make me an omelette rice.”

 

  “Get the eggs yourself then.”

 

  “…Kimchi fried rice.”

 

  He leaned in, playfully rubbing his head on Granny Kyeongyi’s shoulder.

 

  “You smell of sweat, go wash up!”

 

  “That’s mean. Granny Soon-Yi would get the eggs for me and even make omelette rice.”

 

  “Then go ask Soon-Yi for it!”

 

  “I like kimchi fried rice too.”

 

  So fickle. Granny Kyeongyi muttered quietly as she went about her tasks. As she was cutting the kimchi, Yeonwoo suddenly clung to her from behind, prompting her to scold him with a grunt.

 

  “Ah, keep your distance! Why won’t this rascal listen?”

 

  “I had a nightmare.”

 

  At that, Granny Kyeongyi quieted down and said gruffly.

 

  “What, did you see a ghost?”

 

  “No.”

 

  “Then what about that popular thing these days… the one where people get bitten?”

 

  “Zombies?”

 

  “Uh-huh.”

 

  “…It was scarier than that.”

 

  * * *

 

  [Guys, did you watch the variety show ‘Country Occupation’ featuring Kang Do-jun?]

 

  He looks as if he’d only drink Evian water* but he’s super domestic. He’s from the countryside, right? Prepares meals, does the dishes, even runs the laundry, and even hand-washes clothes lmaoo the way he quietly cleans up after Yeonwoo is a highlight. Mr. Kang Do-jun, please come over to my house.

 

  [22 Mine too. Rural Do-jun.]

 

└Rural Do-jun lol but Yeonwoo is even funnier. It’s hilarious that he’s a 25-year-old beekeeper, but did you see his first appearance? One hand holding a fly swatter and the other a beer? I seriously burst into laughter lmfaoo

 

└Totally agree. And did you see his eyes when they said they’re filming in his house? So scary, I thought he’d whack the producer with the fly swatter.

 

└They said they were filming so I went to see, and it was my house. Exactly this expression lmfaooo

 

└In the midst of all that, Yeonwoo and Kang Do-jun really seem to like each other. They must be dating for real. The two should be happy.

 

└No, no, Kang Do-jun just does house chores.

 

└You think…

 

  [Should I live in the countryside too?]

 

  Living in the countryside, elderly folks take care of your meals, and occasionally, Rural Do-jun comes over to clean the house… Isn’t this the life? I want to be like Yeonwoo and be adored by the elderly in the countryside.

 

  [The countryside has a lot of manual labor]

 

└Truth. You’ll adapt.

 

└Yeonwoo is so good with the elderly.

 

└Truth. I can be too!

 

└Sigh… It seems like our writer doesn’t get it, so I’ll just say it outright. Who do you think you are? Do you have Yeonwoo’s face? Why are you so confident? Seriously, why?

 

└Truth. St… stop it!!

 

└When a friend is being roasted? Let’s all shout together! Stop the roast!!!

 

[A comprehensive roundup of Yeonwoo’s past, the star of the talked-about variety show ‘Country Occupation’]

 

  Sorry. I dragged this topic here just to show this. Is it true that Yeonwoo worked on a deep-sea fishing vessel in the past? If you don’t know, go check out the deep-sea fishing vlog on the YouTube channel ‘Wonsun’. Yeonwoo appears briefly in it.

 

  [Wow, writer. I just watched it and that guy is legit insane. Why did he get on a deep-sea fishing vessel? Because he likes fishing. Are you crazy? Just because you like fishing, you board a deep-sea vesselㅠㅠㅜㅠ]

 

└He does whatever the hell he wants. Why did he become a beekeeper? Because honey looked delicious.

 

└Wait, really? That’s why he became a beekeeper?

 

└Well, it does sound like something he would say.

 

└ Lmfaoooo

 

  [Living like Yeonwoo]

 

  Anyone saw the episode with Shin Gihyeon today? Yeonwoo, who doesn’t care about speed or dental care, is totally my role model. Yeonwoo eating a candy stick in 10 seconds… Our mochi… are you okay? His face is soft like mochi, but his teeth are fierce. Does he have steel teeth that don’t require dental care? Or maybe he’s just not afraid of dentists? It just seems like he lives his life on a whim and it’s funny, but also admirable. Life goals…! Live like Yeonwoo!

 

  [You’re definitely a deep-sea fisher.]

 

  └Truth. Ahhhhhhh! emoji_1

 

└Sigh, the way of speaking is so infuriating. Even the ending “Life goals” was slightly annoying.

 

└Heh. Is this what they call receiving the title of “king” ..?

 

└LOL, you’re merciless lmfaoo

 

  [I realized (feat. Really like dog)]

 

  I realized that for a variety show to be successful, even the captions need to be crazy. “Really like dog” makes my heart swell with pride. I felt so pathetic as I muttered to myself, “I’m being too sensitive again;;”. I deeply apologize to the production team of “Country Occupation”. I failed to see your grand vision! And I have one last thing to say.

 

  [There are two ways to annoy someone. One is to stop talking mid-sentence.]

 

└That’s so annoying, really.

 

  [Do-jun’s Biography]

 

  Born on September 16, 19** at A Hospital in Yongsan District, Seoul.

 

  March 3, 20**

 

  Started elementary school.

 

  January 9, 20**

 

  Graduated from elementary school.

 

  March 2, 20**

 

  Enrolled at ○○ Middle School.

  

  January 4, 20**

 

  Graduated from ○○ Middle School.

 

  March 5, 20**

 

  Enrolled at High School.

 

  July 10, 20**

 

  Appeared as a supporting role in B movie (first debut).

 

  January 8, 20**

 

  Graduated from High School.

 

  July 2, 20** Resigned to become Do-jun.

 

  (Etcetera)

 

  [So, what’s the point?]

 

└Ugh. This is why muggles are…

 

└Seriously? You only wrote about school entrance and graduation, and suddenly about resigning to become Do-jun. What are you trying to convey?  

 

└Do I have to spoon-feed you everything?

 

└Where do you live, jerk?

 

└I got it, though? Wow, this is like a tree wiki.

 

└You too, give me your address.

 

  [Our Do-jun… was quite a remarkable personㅠㅠ]

 

└What is this? The Truman Show? Seriously, what insight did you get from this?

 

└Changing careers must’ve been toughㅠ. Do-jun oppa, fighting wherever you are! I’ll always support you.

 

└A big decision was made. Let’s all send him a round of applause.

 

└His name was “Woorong” to begin with. Do-jun was always meant to be domestic.

 

  [Let’s take it easy, Woorong.]

 

  With utmost sincerity. Why… why are you so diligent? Why do you do the laundry? Why do you cook? Why do you clean? Why on earth are you washing other people’s blankets? Please, just live your life carelessly. My parents are always feeling embarrassed because of you. Stop trying so hard on variety shows, stop being so dedicated! Even if you just sit around and act clueless, I’ll still love youㅠ. If someone like you lives with such diligence, what am I supposed to do with my life? I’ll feel so deprived. Alright, I’ll let you have a dog by your side, but please, just live your life recklessly. It’s my lifelong wish.

 

  [Mr. Do-jun 222, please enjoy some pleasures.]

 

  [Isn’t it relative deprivation?]

 

└Damn. Do-jun is my world. Literally, my universe>_