My Servant Is An Elf Knight From Another World

Night had already fallen by the time we left the playground, and unlike most of the general populace probably getting ready to end the day underneath soft warm covers, Amanda seemed to only just be getting ready to start hers.

Must be really frustrating for her, I suppose, that her body was in stark disagreement when it came to where exactly her limits were. Even just looking at her was exhausting in and of itself - truly was a wonder she even made it this far covered up like a resident of Mount Everest.

Yet in spite of all these glaring setbacks, I knew better than to think that a little chill and sniffle was gonna stop this Abominable Snowwoman.

"You don't mind walking for just a bit longer, do you?" she asked me while looking ready to drop dead at any moment. This girl's not human.

"Wrong question from the wrong person," I said, keeping extra close for her to have something to lean on. "Unless you mean walking back to the bike, I don't think we should - "

"Just a bit more," Amanda said, tugging down her scarf slightly for an easier time breathing. "There's one more place I still want to visit. Just one more," she pleaded again, squeezing my hand. "Listen, I joke around - but trust me, I'm not interested in doing more than I can actually handle here. That's more your thing, really…"

Mm, girl's got me there.

"One more spot, you indulge me for just a bit longer, and then we go home and you can pamper and coddle me all you want, okay? I'll even drink all the disgusting tea you want me to, alright? Say it's alright. Come on…"

She was persistent; a lot more than she usually was at that. And I don't think I've known an even greater, tenser sense of anticipation from her than the silence that followed as she waited with sniffling breath for my answer.

No way this was just a 'spot' to her. No one's this single-mindedly determined just for a chance at a little more sightseeing time. This had to be more crucial than that… pivotal even, if you want to be dramatic.

Or romantic.

Who really knows with this woman, right?

Lucky for her, and unluckier for me, I'm also as curious as I am reckless.

"One more," I finally relented to the squeals and squeezes of an ecstatic Amanda. Once I was free to breathe freely again, I started to inquire. "Where are we heading?"

But like the mysterious, mischievous minx she was, Amanda simply veered straight ahead and said, "Up."

And so we marched forward, as foretold and as promised, up higher and higher across the steeping slope turn after turn and street after street… and when I realized that we were still trekking upwards hundreds of steps later, it only then dawned on me that Amanda had once again bamboozled me blind.

She made it sound like the spot was only close by; a hop, skip, and a jump, and voilà we were there. Instead she got us covering a full-on marathon here across town.

One more spot, she says… halfway across the continent, she meant.

"Shit, I'm either dead or daydreaming - Amanda? Amanda Collins back walking down my street again? Can't be…"

We both came to a stop, turned around, but as soon as I did so, Amanda immediately disappeared from my side in a blur of hands violently seizing her away.

I followed the blur and found Amanda in the middle of the street held tightly in a spinning embrace by an elderly woman, a wide smile splitting her lips from ear to ear.

"My God, it is you! Oh, Amanda, my girl!" The woman continued to exclaim. "You're so grown up now - just look at you! You used to be such a tiny brat! Now you're a superstar and everything! You cheek! You cunt! My annoying little bitch… oh, how I missed you so much."

Was it just me, or was there something a bit… off… about this supposed heartfelt reunion happening here?

Right?

Amanda apparently didn't seem to think anything was amiss, hugging the woman just as tight, her eyes beaming just as fervently.

"Missed you too, Aunty Wells," she giggled, staggering back from the hug, her clothes awfully ruffled and scarf hanging for dear life. "I knew it was only a matter of time before you found me - was pretty much just waiting for it."

"Bitch…" the old woman muttered affectionately, and eyes practically welling, seized Amanda again for another round of wrestling.

I just slowly circled around them, hanging back at a respectable distance… feeling a bit like an intruder in an otherwise tender moment.

Now that I had a closer look at the lady herself, she actually looked exactly as she sounds. While she looked old, she definitely wasn't frail. With how fast she moved and how effortlessly she picked Amanda up, she was probably fitter than I was. Blowing in the wind, her hair was a streak of vibrant silver-gray that reminded me of wolves, and also speaking of wolves, she had the look of one too.

Even when she was all smiles and sunshine right then, I could tell she was not one to cross - the kind of person that commanded a presence with just a look alone, and that should she ever scowl in your direction… God have mercy on your soul.

"I noticed Uncle Jeb's place is gone," Amanda said, wriggling herself free. "Thought I could drop by. Was business really that bad since I left or what?"

"Nah, no, the greasy bastard's just fine," the woman said. "Probably in Spain or Brazil or whenever the hell he said he was going off to. I don't remember."

"He's overseas? Why?"

"A new life, the old man said," the woman said with a reproving snort. "After that goopy black shit fiasco a few months back - the guy got it into his head that he's wasting his life slaving away behind a frying pan, so he's retired. Living his best life now, I'm guessing."

"Oh!" Amanda sounded pleased. "That's good to hear! I'm happy for him."

The woman scoffed. "Yeah, and now that's three more blocks down the road to get some breakfast. And Fred can't cook for shit - son of a bitch."

This woman curses like a sailor, and judging by how Amanda just seemed to take it all in stride… her vocabulary must have already been quite rich in her younger years.

They kept talking for a while longer, springing up topics and experiences I could only barely follow… immersed in their own little impenetrable bubble of the past. In-between chatter, the lady lit up a cigarette, which from her sips and puffs, I could tell was a habit she frequently indulged.

Suddenly, somewhere along the line, I somehow caught her eye, and just like that, the bubble popped… and slowly, like an old western flick, a burning stick tucked in her lips, and a heavy scrunched to her gaze, she nudged her head at me.

"And who the hell's this?" I heard her ask, pacing past Amanda and stopping just short of me. "Who're you? What's your name?"

The alpha wolf's baring her fangs, growling right about now. Alright, better not give her any reason to start biting…

"I'm, uh…"

"With me!" Amanda interjected, in a scurrying rush, clinging her arm again around mine. "And if you aren't lying about following my streams, then surely he won't need any introductions, right?"

"Ah," she blinked once, firmly, and with a huff and a puff, the wolf blew out a cloud of smoke into my face. "You're the boyfriend all the other horny shitters only are freaking out about it."

"Aunty Wells!" Amanda flashed her a look, a stern one too. "You be nice to him."

"In a moment," she muttered, still searching me bare with those squinty eyes. "First he's got to give me a reason to be."

That's fair enough, I suppose.

"You're a pretty quiet guy, aren't you?" she remarked. "You don't talk?"

"Not always," I answered, taking in a whiff full of cancer. "Just when I'm needed."

"Don't speak unless you got to, huh?" she glanced back at Amanda. "That doesn't seem like your kind of guy, if you ask me."

"He's got his points," Amanda said.

"Pretty average-looking too."

You caught him at a bad time," Amanda staunchly defended, peering up at me with doting eyes. "He's as dashing as it gets."

"Treats you good?"

"Like a queen."

"How're his kisses?"

"Better than I can ever dream."

"And the sex?"

"None of your damn business."

The lady finished her cig, stamping and snuffing dead into the snow.

"Gotta say - he's not what I imagined from what I kept hearing about him on and on in your videos. You made him sound like he's perfect."

"Duh! That's because he is! Look at him! What's not to love?"

Plenty apparently, going by her stare.

"So?" Amanda said. "Perfect, right?"

"I'll take your word for it," the lady dubiously muttered, inflicting me again with his squinty-eyed judgments. "So? Just gonna let your girlfriend do all the work defending you in your stead?"

"Don't see any reason to stop her now," I said, shrugging, smiling. "She's doing a very good job at it so far."

And on that end, we were in agreement. Lady-Wolf eased up a bit, taking a distancing step and staring at us both with our arms entwined as one.

"Alright, whatever, fuck it - your life, your love, Amanda. But you ask me, I say you can do a lot better."

"You also said being a fisherwoman was my absolute calling in life," Amanda smiled sweetly. "Always the well of wisdom, huh, Aunty Wells?"

"Fair," she smirked, turning to me again. "Alright, I'm probably just talking out of my ass. You seem alright, kid. Don't mind me."

"Never had," I said to her. "Hadn't said anything I've never heard before a million times over."

"Mmm, yeah, dating a superstar like her must be quite a bitch, huh?"

I nodded. "The best kind of bitch."

"Ah," the wolf dropped her glare, started wagging her tail. "Yeah, you're definitely alright."

Seems I managed to tame her for now.

"So," slowly, she drifted her eyes from left to right. "What exactly are the two of you doing in this shithole of a town at this hour?"

"Amanda wanted to visit," I said

"We're going up," Amanda chimed in.

"Up?" the lady-wolf frowned, confusion wrinkling her expression for a brief time. Then quickly it cleared, and her confusion was gone. "Oh. Up."

"Yep," Amanda affirmed, smiling wide. "Up."

Alright, okay, what the heck is this shared ambiguity they have? Why are they deliberately so vague? What's with this look they're having?

Alright, damn it, I'll bite.

"What's up?"