41 – 10. The Path You’ve Walked (3)

1.

It’s a dream.

The fragrant breeze gently tickles the cheeks.

The sunlight streaming through the leaves was warm.

It’s truly a perfect day.

That’s why this must be a dream.

Reality can’t be perfect.

Above all.

“Leven.”

If a parted lover smiles tenderly, gently strokes your head, this is even less real.

You want this, but this is not what you desire.

Desire craves the real thing.

…It’s the witch’s doing.

Falling for the same trick as before is as foolish as hitting your head against a wall.

But.

It’s happiness.

The happiness felt now is real.

Even if what’s in front of you is fake, the pounding heartbeat is real.

Isn’t this better?

Whether it’s real or fake, does it really matter?

As long as you’re happy.

Leuen extended her hand toward Evan, who was smiling at her.

“Evan… Will you forgive me?”

How shameless these words were.

But it’s something one could say in a dream.

“I’ll forgive you. In return, stay by my side forever.”

Evan took Leuen’s hand.

He knows it’s a dream.

He knows it’s fake.

He keeps repeating it in his mind.

Yet, her heart fluttered.

“Yes… I’ll stay by your side forever.”

The real Evan said he would forget everything and start anew.

Could I do the same?

Leuen shook her head inwardly.

If I’m going to live trapped in reality or a dream or the past, I’d rather live in this dream.

Leuen smiled.

It’s joyful.

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It’s happy.

She prayed for this moment to last forever.

That’s when it happened.

“…Leuen.”

A voice called her from a distance, not right beside her.

She turned her head.

There, too, was Evan.

But this Evan had a cold face.

Instinctively, she recognized that it wasn’t a warm dream but a cold reality.

“Get up.”

Reality approaches.

Simultaneously, the forgotten sense of guilt surged.

The ground shook, and the flower garden darkened as if waves spread.

“Evan… Evan….”

Leuwen hung onto the dream.

“Ah…”

It was a nightmare.

Evan, who had just been playfully teasing her moments ago, disappeared.

“No… no…!”

Leuwen tore at her hair.

She trembled, biting her nails.

Is it impossible to find happiness even in dreams?

The thought was so laughable that she laughed. And cried.

With tears streaming down her face, Leuwen hugged her knees, sporting a twisted expression of a smile.

“Ahahahaha, I made a mistake… I made a mistake… hehehe, I made a mistake….”

Evan tightly shut his eyes at the sight.

Everything fell apart completely.

Finally, it exploded.

All the things she had held back could no longer be contained and erupted.

“Ah!”

Leuwen had a good idea.

She couldn’t find happiness in reality.

She couldn’t find happiness in dreams either.

That won’t work.

This won’t work.

Then there was only one option left.

“…. I can die.”

She chose the most irresponsible form of happiness.

Leuwen found a sword.

As if it had been waiting for her, the sword appeared in her hand.

Leuwen extended her arm, positioning the blade towards her own chest.

Someone whispers in her ear.

You don’t have to suffer anymore.

You don’t have to be sad anymore.

Let’s throw everything away and be freed.

“Ha, hahahahaha… Yeah, it’s over.”

He drew his sword.

-Swish!!

“Are you planning to leave like this again?”

The blade pierced Evan’s hand.

“Ah….”

Leuen’s hazy pupils turned towards Evan.

She was in despair.

“Please… Please let me die.”

Leuen pleaded, clinging onto Evan.

Asking him not to interfere.

“I will atone for my sins with death. I don’t know. I really don’t know what to do now. I can’t be forgiven, right? Yeah, I can’t be forgiven. hahahahaha, with my foolish mind, this is the only way left. No! I’m even more foolish than I think. There’s a better way. It would be more repentant to die by Evan’s hand than dying by my own. So please, kill me. Stab me as much as you hate me.”

Leuen handed the sword to Evan and laughed.

“I didn’t make a mistake this time, hehehe.”

It was a sick laughter.

Evan looked down at the sword.

There was a time when he was filled with resentment, wanting to kill her. But because he truly loved her, he couldn’t kill her.

Can I forgive her?

I wasted not just a year, but five years of my life.

I lived with hatred, and breathed with anger.

But that doesn’t mean Leuen lived comfortably.

She was also trapped by the curse.

She lived like a cripple as well.

She immersed herself in deep sadness, shedding tears until her tear ducts ran dry. She even tried to harm herself out of guilt.

Meanwhile, love made her go crazier.

Even after parting ways, she was miserable because she sincerely loved Evan. Because she knew it couldn’t come true.

Coming back again.

So can I forgive Leuen?

Evan raised the sword high.

Upon seeing the soaring sword, Ruen closed his eyes.

He spread his arms.

He would accept the sword with a joyful heart.

Ruen awaited the cold touch of metal with a sense of liberation.

However,

What approached Ruen was not coldness but warmth.

“Huh…?”

He opened his eyes.

Ruen was in Evan’s embrace.

“Someone decided for me.”

Evan muttered.

“You can’t die on your own. You can never die until I allow it.”

Thinking of a past lover, Evan tightly embraced Ruen.

He pressed the head against his chest and pulled the waist.

Without resistance, Ruen nestled against Evan’s chest, and his cheek was pressed against Evan’s chest.

Before letting go of the woman he had loved, he held her for the last time.

“Do you really want to die?”

Ruen, who seemed incredulous, nodded his head, shaking it back and forth.

“Then, I’ll give you a chance.”

“A chance…?”

“I’ll somehow compensate for the life I abandoned because of you.”

Evan slowly released Ruen.

“Then, at that time, I’ll kill you with my own hands.”

Blue eyes looked down at golden eyes.

“You’re dying right now. If you don’t get up, you’ll die within a month.”

Evan placed a sword in Ruen’s hand.

“If you’re really sorry to me, don’t die here.”

A door appeared in the garden of withered black flowers.

Humans make mistakes.

“No, humans make mistakes because they are human.

As a result, they inflict wounds upon each other. And continuing relationships by applying a balm of reflection to those wounds is what makes humans a lowly existence.

For this purpose, God created emotions in humans.

And emotions ultimately lead us, you and me, to smile at each other. It was not created to bring about unhappiness but to create happiness.

So, one could say that giving opportunities like this is an instinct of humans.

The wounds caused by mistakes cannot be left unattended forever. I don’t want to leave them unattended.

Evan walked towards the door.

*Creak*

Without looking back, he opened the door and left.

“…”

Lerwen stood dumbfounded, staring at the door.

Approaching cautiously, she slowly opened the door.

A massive spinning wheel creaked.

It was the last thing she saw when she defeated the witch in her dream.

The spinning wheel was making red thread, and the red soul that served as its material was being extracted from Lerwen’s heart.

Lerwen drew her sword.

2.

He opened his eyes.

Evan released Lerwen’s hand and exhaled.

His head was throbbing.

Entering the inner world consumed a considerable amount of mental energy because it meant peering into an entire life of one person.

“Magician.”

Karen, who had been waiting for Evan to open his eyes, approached cautiously.

“What happened?”

Evan looked at Lerwen with tired eyes and said, “I don’t know. Whether he wakes up or not is something he has to decide for himself.”

He wiped the sweat on his forehead with his sleeve.

“Since we’ve given him a chance, let’s wait and see.”

The dissolution had been decided, for now.

The gathered members were all sent away.

Because anything could happen in the meantime, Evan decided to stay and take care of Leven.

Evan looked at Leven’s arm.

Snowy white skin.

But not entirely clean.

It was filled with gruesome scars.

Having seen all of her memories, he knew exactly how each wound came about. And he knew the emotions of that time as well.

“You should have lived happily after leaving.”

Although he had wished for her unhappiness, seeing her truly miserable didn’t bring the satisfaction he expected.

Ironically, he would have despised and resented her more if she had lived joyfully and happily. That way, he could look at his current situation and laugh gleefully.

“Sigh…”

Evan kept exhaling the heavy breath rising in his chest, looking at Leven.

“You said your goodbyes as you pleased, so I’ll say mine as I please.”

Finally, he completely let go of the past love.

“…I loved you.”

Evan spoke calmly.

With this, no emotions remained for Leven.

He could now brush it all off and welcome a true new beginning.

He stood up.

Needed to get some fresh air for a moment.

And that was the moment.

“…I, I love you.”

Evan turned around at that voice.

“Forever… I’ll love you.”

Leven opened her eyes.

“Even if it means only you suffer.”

“Even so.”

Evan looked into Leven’s eyes.

Taken aback for a moment, Leven averted her gaze, then cautiously met his eyes again. And she slowly uttered her determined words.

“Whether it’s Evan’s anger or sadness, anytime… I’ll continue to love you, accepting it all.”

He spoke reluctantly, as if spitting out the words.

Just hearing those words made her heart flutter.

“…Do as you wish.”

It wasn’t complete liberation, but that one phrase gave Leven a small sense of relief.

Just to be sure, Leven sought confirmation once more.

“Um, really… I can do as I wish?”

Evan averted his gaze.

“Yeah.”

And then he left.

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