When the Peak Meets Peak Crazy

Fang Shan: “Starting tomorrow night, I’ll give you remedial lessons.”

Wei Sushen got up, opening a drawer that was packed full of certificates and took out a copy of the teaching credentials qualification.

Fang Shan: “You resell fake certifications?”

“They’re genuine,” Wei Sushen said righteously.

Fang Shan wanted to touch it and see if it was the real deal but Wei Sushen closed the drawer in a snap, saying, “The headmaster of Aige [B1] Academy is an old acquaintance with my parents. Working there for some time won’t be difficult at all.”

After hearing that, Fang Shan looked miserable. He realised his work had already been cut out for him.

Wei Sushen’s work ethic was extremely high, and as a result the expectations he held his subordinates to were strict as well. Finding out he wasn’t going to be at the company for a while, all of his employees felt their heart rate go down. The joy they felt deep in their soul was too much to be hidden.

Aige Academy, Three Days Later

It didn’t matter what type of school it was, the air of youthfulness could not be concealed. Even at Aige Academy, which was made up of the rich second generation, there was a long-lost feeling of connection the moment one entered.

The school building was fashioned in a western-style. At first glance, it resembled a castle, filled with stone carvings. Flowers of every kind bloomed, a stream ran over a rock garden shaded by trees, even the back gardens of the emperor are nothing compared to this.

Wei Sushen was about to take over the duties of teaching Class 3, who had the worst grades.

The head-teacher for the class was currently on leave, supposedly due to illness. Kids these days were unpleasant to teach, especially the little brats in Class 3. If there was a single word of criticism they would go to their parents and demand to sue. While some parents could be reasonable, others think their child is the most well-behaved little royal under the sun. If there was a problem with them learning the material, it was clearly because the teacher was no good[B2] !

It's even worse to offend the children of the rich and noble families. Although the previous head teacher was almost back to full health, he refused to go back to the Academy[B3] .

When Wei Sushen was working, Fang Shan could only live in the other person’s head.

“I already drafted out the speech, you can take it in a bit and use it in the class as your welcome introduction.”

Wei Sushen shook his head.

Fang Shan let out a sigh, “don’t refuse so quickly. This is a culmination of my many years of experience. Some exaggerated declarations increase the value of coolness points when it tallies up in the end.”

When bound to the system, Fang Shan carries his hosts to the highest standing, with a high task-competition rate. Take the speech as an example; how it’s written, when the opportune moment to say it, only he had the skill to know the cues. Even if other people tried to copy him, they would not be able to have the same extraordinary effect.

Fang Shan thought for a long time before he was able to come up with a few missions to judge [B4].

Wei Sushen was a very pragmatic person. If there are benefits to be had in a situation, it’s only natural that he would go after and profit from them.

The period bell was a graceful piano melody. Still the third class was loud and rambunctious, the quiet lesson atmosphere nowhere in sight. There were innumerable students still playing on their phones and with each other to the point when Wei Sushen walked in, nobody even glanced his way.

“Hello, students,” he said, “My surname is Wei, and I will be taking over from your head teacher during this period of time.”

His rich and magnetic voice attracted many of the young schoolgirls. A few rubbed their eyes, not drawn in by his handsome face but recognizing him as Wei Sushen. At their age they had attended quite a few dinner parties with their parents, and Wei Sushen was a well known big-shot in the circle so of course they have seen his face a few times.

“Hey,” someone whispered, “isn’t that Wei-Shushu[B5] ?”

“Maybe? What if they just look alike?”

“He has the same scar on his left hand, as well as the same surname. It’s definitely got to be the same person.”

Wei Sushen knocked on the podium and the class abruptly fell silent. “Before we start, there are a few things I want to say to all of you.

“As your teacher, I am willing to turn into a moth, flapping my wings to stamp out the flames of your restlessness time and time again. This noble occupation was one I chose freely, and I vow to endow you with knowledge more plentiful than water, and the blazing passion of your emotions will thaw your soul. Although today you are but a common student of Aige Academy, the Aige Academy of tomorrow will certainly be honored to call you students[B6] !”

When he finished reading Fang Shan’s exaggerated speech, Wei Sushen paused. Each and every student had their eyes open incredulously. The Wei Families Wei Sushen……was he insane?

Usually Wei Sushen’s image was of a no-nonsense [B7] man. He was stern and cold but right now he was nothing but a mild-mannered teacher with a open smile. He said “It’s only natural that if any of you do not meet my requirements by the end of the semester, my conscious will feel quite guilty that I was not able to teach you well.”

The students faced each other, not knowing what he meant.

Wei Sushen’s gentle smile remained unchanged: “When the time comes, there may be some students who transfer because they don’t appreciate my way of teaching.”

The students’ pupils shrunk……

Transfer?

Without a doubt they wouldn’t ask to be transferred, unless their families became bankrupt and unable to pay the school tuition fees.

That must mean that what Wei Sushen actually meant was……if their grades were bad, they would go bankrupt in minutes?

Many of the students took a deep breath, cautiously looking at Wei Sushen and hoping he would refute his previous statement and say something much more pleasing.

Reality, however, gave them a hard slap. Wei Sushen narrowed his eyes and said “It seems everybody’s reading and listening comprehension isn’t bad.”

“……”

When he finish explaining those key points, Wei Sushen started his lectures.

Nobody dared to play on their phones any longer. Even though Wei Sushen taught in a clear and concise voice, these students had neglected their studies for too long. For them it was like listening to a bunch of imperial edicts[B8] .

When class had ended, Wei Sushen made a parent-teacher group. “Before tomorrow, I hope there will be plenty of parents joining this group.”

Someone searched it up and found the name was ‘it’s getting cold’[B9] . A cold sweat broke across the group.

A girl tugged on her desk-mate’s sleeve, her face frozen in terror “ ‘it’s getting cold’? Are we going to be bankrupt?”

“Don’t say nonsense!” Her desk-mate shouted. However she was unsure in her heart as well.

Wei Sushen didn’t assign too much homework. Closing the textbook he said meaningfully, “take this seriously.”

When his figure completely disappeared from the classes view, the student’s straightened spines drooped in a flash.

“We’re screwed,” someone murmured.

The one with the biggest headache was the classes’ beauty. Her family station was only about average, as she debuted as a child idol and met many influential figures later. She was very successful in the entertainment industry despite her young age.

Aige Academy was a good move. It would be difficult for her to reach the grading criteria of the film and media school with her scores from her cultural course, so she was intending to do an exchange year and get her diploma. As luck would have it, Wei Sushen is one of the investors for the company she signed onto. If her grades didn’t meet his requirements, would she be buried in the snow[B10] ?

While the students stewed in uneasiness, Wei Sushen was busy preparing lessons in the office. His aura of ‘strangers stay away’ made even the teachers who wanted to strike a friendly conversation flinch back.

“Why aren’t these children bratty enough, eh[B11] ?” Fang Shan said, a bit regretfully.

Although they had been together for some days now, Wei Sushen still wasn’t very used to the sudden voice in his mind. His hand holding the pen stopped. “Does that affect the ending score?”

“No, it won’t,” Fang Shan said, “but people the same age as those kids consider them the devil incarnate.”

The day in the life of a teacher passed quickly. Wei Sushen was in charge of maths and taught at least two classes every day. When his work was done, the student’s who suffered unspeakable misery stayed in that state until they returned home. That night, countless hotshots were shocked to see their children hitting the books with worried expressions.

When they found out Wei Sushen had actually come to teach and threatened them with their end of semester performance, everyone’s eyes immediately opened wide.

“Ba[B12] , can I stop studying?”

Mathematics was a very difficult subject for regular people to understand. The father of the local tyrant rubbed his son’s head and said in distress “I’ll find out what’s going on first thing tomorrow, for now you should just keep on studying.”

“If what he said was true,” the father clenched his teeth, “then there will only be one way you learn: from the dead.”

“……”

That night, all the parents had become members of the ‘it’s getting cold’ group.

[Group Announcement:

Parents, you’re invited to take note of this form: the group business card is XXXParent[B13] ]

9pm, ‘it’s getting cold’ parent group:

Jiang Aoyu’s Father: Hello, Laoshi[B14]

Wei Sushen: What’s the problem?

Jiang Aoyu’s Father: May I ask a somewhat personal question? Wei-zong[B15] , why did you come to be a teacher?

Wei Sushen: Because of a great love for education, which is a stepping stone for humanity’s success.

Jiang Aoyu’s Father: Ah, Wei-zong, no, Wei-laoshi [B16] has a wonderful opinion.

Hu Yu’s Mother: Wei-laoshi is working very hard.

Zhao Zhicheng’s Mother: Laoshi, don’t worry, I will take time every day to check my child’s

homework.”

Chen Ling’s Father: I will do the same!

……

As the messages rolled in one after the other, Wei Sushen looked at the screen and gave a light laugh. “This was a good idea.”

A wine bottle rolled several times on the ground, breaking the peaceful quiet in the room.

Not far away, Fang Shan was sprawled out on the floor. Since returning to human form, he had already downed three bottles of wine.

Wei Sushen sighed, laying down his phone so he could haul Fang Shan onto the bed to sleep it off. Halfway through, one very drunk Fang Shan opened his blurred eyes and waved his hand. “Hello host, I’m 666.”

He didn’t stop until Wei Sushen helplessly said “Hello 666.”

Fang Shan stopped talking, but the look in his eyes was that he wanted to say everything on his mind. In that split second, Wei Sushen thought he had a misconception. It was almost like he could see an endless wave of sadness in Fang Shan’s eyes.

“Ouuuu[B17] —” Fang Shan suddenly sat up shakily and said “I’m gonna puke.”

Wei Sushen froze. “Not here!”

His face was dark as he tried to carry the other person to the bathroom. Fang Shan wasn’t too cooperative, squirming around like worm on a hook. To speed the whole process up so he wouldn’t vomit in Wei Sushen’s bedroom, he simply stood up and carried Fang Shan over his shoulder.

Walking through the hallway, Fang Shan kept on giggling: “Drive!”

With each step, Wei Sushen’s expression became uglier.

Fang Shan: “I can’t help it.”

Turning his head, Wei Sushen said “If you dare vomit, you’re going to die!”

As soon as he said that, a wine bottle cap flew out of Fang Shan’s mouth, hitting Wei Sushen square on the forehead.

Fang Shan was still laughing foolishly. “Bullseye!”

The bottle cap landed at Wei Sushen’s feet. Apart from the scent of wine, saliva was also glistening on it.

Wei Sushen no longer gave a damn as to why Fang Shan spat out a wine bottle cap. “Fang. Shan.” Each word oozed with thinly veiled murderous intent.

However Fang Shan had fallen asleep again, snoring lightly in a very human-like fashion.

From beginning to end of that exchange, Wei Sushen finally understood what is felt like to be so pissed off at someone yet unable to do a thing about it[B18] .

……

Six-thirty the next morning, the silhouette of the moon was stubbornly hidden behind the clouds. Wei Sushen was still dreaming but his brows were still furrowed from last night, even when he slept.

[The early bird gets the worm[B19] , we invite the host to get up early and clock in.]

After his forced awakening from the cold mechanical voice, Wei Sushen’s state was much like that of an evil spirit, black energy emanating ominously from his body.

Fang Shan came over, handing him a glass of warm water and gently said “Wake up, your face is all covered with little red marks.

Wei Sushen lowered his head, showing a weird smile. “Does it look familiar?”

Fang Shan stared at the red dots attentively……it seemed, most likely, that they were left by a beer cap.

The Author Has Something to Say:

'It's cold' parent group, you are worth it!

The Translator Has Something to Say:

I am so so sorry for completely dipping out lmao I got caught up reading about drama hehehe

For future updates, I will try to keep 3 updates per week, but due to shit going down, I'm unsure. I do know WPMPC will be released on Mondays and Thursdays for sure, and NTNH on Wednesdays and Saturdays, but there may be a few extra releases sprinkled in the middle.

again this ain't edited because i have a lot of stuff on my plate

but damn i wish i could have some hot guy threaten me if i didn't perform to his standards hehe.

(edit: that was in my notes and i left in in for reader-translator bonding moment bc i know some of you lovelies are thirsty like me)

[B1]Dumb ******* aige **** word I have no gosh darn clue what it's supposed to be like it's basically Mugwort Pattern like wtf is that supposed to mean. Literally I've only seen those together in the name Agnes but that has two more mother******* characters I even caved and stuck it in google translate and it comes up with iger. What the actual **** is iger? It sounds mighty close to a slur that's what. I sweat to all things that are holy I am going to cry. If it sounds like I'm being overdramatic well guess what it's that time of month and I feel like Jie the crotchless wonder and my goddamn midterm was on Sunday but the classes are all on Monday so I was late by 24hours. Uni is overrated. Back to our regularly scheduled program. [B2]Ahh, don't you love working in a people-oriented field? [B3]Aww poor teacher, having to deal with a bunch of bratty kids haha [B4]God my english isnt englishing today. [B5]'uncle', used for family, family friends, as well as people a generation above you. [B6]If this sounds absolutely trash that's because it's just as bad in chinese and I kept the spirit of FS by not giving any fucks while translating. [B7]It's an idiom (bugouyanxiao) meaning reserved, sober, taciturn etc. No-nonsense fits the term [B8]The word is 'tianshu', literally heavens books, or imperial edicts and is used to describe something illegible for hopefully obvious reasons. It's like finishing tenth grade and immediately jumping to post-grad law school books, they make you want to jump in a hole and die. [B9]Note: 'tianleng'. The 'leng' part, meaning 'cold' can also be used figuratively to say 'I'm disappointed. it can also be a threat that they'll be broke and cold. [B10]My man wss has no shame threatening highschoolers and honestly if they were bratty I would do the same. [B11]It's a particle ending kind of similar to 'ba', but I feel the 'eh' I put solidified that I'm Canadian. [B12]Informal term for father [B13]No clue what that is supposed to mean. I'll double check later. [B14]Formal address for teacher/ instructor. Kind of like sensei [B15]Another honorific, a bit more respectful. [B16]So basically he's calling him Wei-zong, which is usually respectful but in this case is questioning his qualifications in teaching. When wss answers, he's switches to laoshi. [B17]Think of when you're drunk and about to say something, that 'ougghhuuuu' noise that's hard to spell out. That's the noise he makes. [B18]I completely bs-ed this sentence, the original was kind of hard to understand but the gist was that Wei Sushen who is used to getting what he wanted was introduced to the brand new feeling of an infuriating little shit that he wasn't able to pummel against a tree like he deserved.

[B19]Idiom 'yirizhijizaiyuchen', make your plan for the day early in the morning