Hard Mode Idol

God let out a soft laugh. What’s so funny about it? It’s unfair to me.

“It was the most earnest dream in your previous life. Would you like to try that?”

“I’m dead. What do you mean by a dream?”

“There’s a way.”

“How? Are you going to let me live twice in my life?”

“That’s right.”

I just said it out of the blue, but he said it’s right. I looked at him with a puzzled look on my face.

“You said it was the last time?” 

“Yes.” 

“You say I can’t reincarnate?”

“So instead of reincarnation, you will use another body. The soul reconstructs the empty body into you. It’s called reincarnation for convenience, but it’s not technically reincarnation. Just think you’re reincarnated because it’s annoying to explain.” 

“It’s totally up to you.”

There was nothing I could do, so I spit it out as I felt it. My life is over anyway; doesn’t it mean my soul is over too? It’s my speciality to be bold in the face of such unpredictable events.

“So, God.”

“Ah, yes yes.”

I heard laughter as I clenched my fist.

“You wanted to be loved. You also liked to dance and sing. From my point of view, you have what it takes to be an idol. Don’t you want to try again?”

My shoulders flinched. I didn’t want to pay attention but reacted without realizing it. Isn’t he a real devil? Otherwise, he can’t just pick out such annoying words. 

“Even if there are no demons.”

However, I didn’t have a good memory of the result or process to answer quickly.

“It’s not like I can be loved on my own. I got burned once. What else do you want to do?”

God smiled at my wrong answer and pointed his index finger at himself. The figure seemed to say ‘I’m God,’ with pride.

“You don’t want to do it?”

I want to do it if I can. I want to feel that life is loved. As the man who called himself a god said, I liked to sing and dance. I did it often. So, to avoid getting involved with the members unnecessarily, I woke up every morning and practiced. However—.

I fixed my posture and asked seriously.

“Why are you making this offer to me?”

Isn’t there some reason? Even though I was treated badly no matter what, I was more cautious because there was no opposition. If it’s a God, he can push me into a more trashy life and giggle, right? The worst thing in the world is hope and torture. I know it well because I’ve been through it a lot.

“You’ve met the conditions.”

“What are the conditions?”

“One. It must be the last soul. Two. Wouldn’t have committed suicide. Three. You must be a clean soul.”

I deliberately snorted and said sarcastically.

“I’m not the only one who met the conditions, right?”

“Surprisingly, it doesn’t happen that often. Most of them die without being born in the first place, but in that case, there is nothing you can do. I can’t have a conversation because it’s before their ego is formed. Then there are many suicides. Even if they survive to the end, they eventually eat other souls and stain them.” 

God shrugged his shoulders and spoke in a gentle tone. Then he looked at me and smiled. Unlike a while ago, he added in a voice that felt excited.

“It’s a soul I’ve been looking for for a long time.”

I asked without dropping my guard.

“Why are you looking? Can’t you just let it disappear? Isn’t it troublesome?”

“To play a game.”

Game? what game?

“Racing game. You are my horse.”

“Are there multiple Gods?”

“Of course. There are so many souls. How can I manage it by myself?”

“Well. So, it sounds like a game where the Gods pick up lost souls.”

God smiled strangely and followed me with a few words in his mouth as if he liked the expression “lost soul.”

“No. The terms are all different. First of all, we turned the wheel on the common condition that our side would be a clean soul, but this time, I got the most difficult one. It will take 100 million years to get it back, but we have 80 million years left, you know? So you will play. It’s good for you and for me too.” 

Ah. This God is not interested in me. I thought it was literally just the conditions. He was just looking at me as a ‘horse’ without any emotion. Still, it was better than having an insidious mind. I like it because it’s clean.

“You’re not going to say I can’t win the game because I’m weak in the middle, right?”

“Of course not. You just have to live the second life you’re given. Even if you fail or give up, the life I gave you will be yours. All decisions are yours. I’m just sitting on the sidelines.”

“Then what happened to the owner of this body?”

“He was the last soul just like you, and he committed suicide. So it has to be in the same stage to put your soul in. Luckily, I recovered your soul, but it took time because I could hardly find a body to turn it into you.”

God’s eyes turned to my left wrist. I saw a clear mark on my wrist when I unintentionally looked at it.

It was only one line. That alone could tell how deeply and sincerely the owner of this body drew to die. Most of the suicide scars are repeated multiple times. So it’s not easy. 

“If you say yes, the body will be reconstructed into you. I’ve got the consent, so it’s no problem.”

I don’t know what he means by being reconstructed. Did he get consent from the owner of this body? Did he give up his body when he said he would die?

“In exchange for providing the body, I am now collecting it. We don’t know what will happen later.”

“What do you mean?”

“You will know when you play.”

He avoided answering for the first time. Is there anything he can answer or not? Or is it whim?

“There’s a rule between us. Ask me anything. I’ll tell you what I can tell you.”

I could feel the will to get me into the game somehow. Does he want to do that? I’ve felt that God was very human.

“Humans were made after us, so it’s the other way around. You guys look like us.”

“Ah, yes yes.”

Let’s just ask questions because I feel like losing my mind. God laughed.

“Then what kind of life did this person lead?”

“It’s similar to you. Reached the end of the cycle, yeah. Just like dead souls.”

It was hard to understand, but I could almost guess if it were similar to what I knew. Then, feeling a subtle sense of identity, I threw up a question that popped into my mind.

“If this person and I are both worthless people, isn’t it the same that people will hate me?”

“I will put my grace into your soul. Then you become an ordinary soul.”

“So you mean people don’t hate me for no reason?”

“Yeah, if you try, you can achieve your dream. You can be loved by many people.”

It’s a little shaky—. It was a dream that was only wounded and abandoned. I also wanted to be a precious person to someone. I wanted to have a normal conversation with someone. And I can do that?

“You can do it. Above all, I have a guide to help you. You like games, so I prepared them in a game style to suit your taste!”

God opened his eyes. It looked like the funniest thing so far. But, seeing the excitement of saying, ‘Ah, I’m finally trying this out,’ it seemed that my intentions were not reflected.

I didn’t say I would do it yet, though? God’s eyebrows drooped as soon as I thought about it in my head. He looks at me with pitiful eyes.

Let me think for a second. It’s a game-like style. So I thought of the games that I played in my head.

Do I have any stats? If there are stats, there will be a difference between fixed and growth types. Does he give me skills? Do I need skills to become an idol? Then a title? Item? Pet—no.

Various game genres were jumbled up and floating around in my head. I was trying hard to figure out what to ask for in the beginning, but God just laughed. When I remembered he could read my thoughts, I bit my lips. He looked at the insides that I was about to tear apart.

“I heard that some people want early support from time to time, and that’s true. It’s very interesting and fun. It’s my first time meeting you, so I can make it a little bigger. First, I’ll give you 10,000 initial points. Then, you can raise your stat rank.”

I ate all the unnecessary words and picked up only the necessary information. First of all, it has stats and is a growth type. As of now, I have no idea how much 10,000 points are. I quickly expressed my opinion because I thought I needed to find out more.

“Why don’t I get Max for just one stat?”

“That’s not allowed. How many points do you need to get to S+?” 

God threw hints as I wanted. For each stat, Max is up to S+. I need points to raise it. Then the higher the rank, the more points required. Since he said he wouldn’t raise it to Max, I can’t reach Max with 10,000. Then is it roughly A?

I looked at God’s expression to make sure I was right, but there was no change. I couldn’t tell if he was putting on a good poker face or if I was wrong in my reasoning. If I know the level I can reach with 10,000 points, I can figure out how hard it is to get points, which is a shame.

“What about this if you don’t get tempted by 10,000?”

“What is it?”

“Let’s turn the wheel!”

God snapped his finger, and a wheel appeared in front of him. It seems that all humans repeat the same mistakes because they resemble God. Is he telling me to do this while it’s a failure? 

The type of stat was written on the wheel. There were a total of 21, ranging from F- to S+. Needlessly and fairly, they were all divided in equal proportions.

“I won’t do it.”